Finding the Good in Hard Times

As a child, the name "Good Friday" always confused me.  How is it good if it commemorates the day Jesus died?  I understood that Easter was the joyful celebration of Jesus' resurrection, the triumph of good over evil, and the hope of eternal life in relationship with God.  But how is the suffering of that Friday good?

I had to go through some suffering of my own to learn its potential.

Whether or not you're a Christian, you're going to go through hard times at some point.  The world isn't perfect, and struggles and disappointments are real.  A strong and hopeful perspective is one you'll want to cultivate.

15 lessons we might learn from hard times

1.  We might learn that we're stronger than we know, and that we can survive things we never thought we could endure.  

2.  We can learn to let the past go, wake up tomorrow, and try again.

3.  We learn not to waste energy on things that aren't important in the long run.  We get better at prioritizing.

4.  We learn who really cares about us, and who we can turn to for help and support.  We learn that we're not alone in our suffering – others can empathize because they've suffered too.

5.  We learn compassion, and may become less likely to judge others, realizing that we don't know what they've had to deal with in their lives.

6.  We might become fearful and ready to see the worst in circumstances and people, or we might learn courage and optimism.  We have a choice.

7.  We learn that even though we can't control many of the situations in our lives, we can control how we respond to them.  We can either cling stubbornly to our expectations, or we can release them and adapt.

8.  We learn the darkness of despair, and the power of one spark of hope.

9.  We learn the value of even small acts of kindness.

10.  We learn that doing something to help someone else gives us a sense of purpose and takes our mind off our own troubles.

11.  We learn to look for the good things in life that still exist even when we're suffering, whether it's love and care from other people, beautiful music, the natural world, or something else.

12.  We learn that a setback allows us to start over, and maybe try a new approach we wouldn't have imagined otherwise.

13.  We learn that complaining and fretting don't make situations better.  However, taking positive action (including asking for help and looking for something to be grateful for) does improve a hard situation.

14.  We have a chance to learn that minimalism in our homes and habits leaves more time and energy to cope with our difficulties.

15.  We learn that one day, things won't seem so bad.  Suffering doesn't last forever.

My prayer for you

If you're a Christian, you know that Good Friday is the necessary prelude to Easter Sunday.  The joy of resurrection doesn't exist without the pain of death.  But you don't have to be religious at all to benefit from this lesson.

If you're struggling today, I hope that you'll feel the comfort and support from someone who cares about you.  I hope you'll be able to look around you and see something that's lovely and good, that will bring at least a bit of hope and appreciation to your heart.  I hope that with time, your deepest hurts will become a source of blessing because of how you've changed or what you've learned as a result.

And if all is well with you, may you be a blessing to someone else.  Let kindness and generosity be your strongest attributes.

Practice kindness all day to everybody, and you will realize you're already in heaven.

Jack Kerouac