How (and Why) to Change the Way You Look at Clutter

Have you struggled to declutter?  I have, and I know I'm not alone.  It's not just the physical effort and constant decisions that can make decluttering hard.  It's also the emotions attached to things that we've owned for a long time, or that have been passed to us from loved ones.  It's the guilt we feel about how much we've spent, or how we never used something as much as we "should" have.  And it's the second-guessing that makes us wonder if we'll regret removing something, or worry that we might need it in the future.

That's a lot of issues conspiring to keep us stuck with our clutter.  No wonder decluttering is something that many people say they want to do, but so few actually accomplish it and live to tell the tale!

Here's the good news:  You don't have to be naturally neat or a compulsive organizer in order to declutter effectively.  Decluttering is not about forcing yourself to let go.  It's about shifting the way you view your belongings.

That's because decluttering success begins in your mind.

If your current mindset is keeping you overwhelmed and frustrated, it might be time to shift your perspective.

5 new perspectives on clutter

1.  Stop thinking "What if I regret getting rid of this?"

Try "What if getting rid of this opens the door to something better?"

Yes, you might fit into those jeans again someday.  And yes, there might come a time when you wish you had that pasta maker or those old blankets.  But how often do those "somedays" occur?

When you keep stuff you're not using, it impacts you today.  That's because clutter crowds your space and makes it harder to access the things you do use.  Are you sure you want to trade a simpler, more effective present for an imaginary future?

There's a possibility you'll miss something you declutter, but it's by no means certain.  So why not choose to believe you'll be happier without the excess baggage?  Letting go could make room for something better – more space, more focus, and less stress.

2.  Stop thinking "I paid a lot for this, and can't just give it away!"

Try "I feel better with less clutter, and my well-being is valuable too."

I hate wasting money, so I understand why letting go of things you paid for (maybe even saved up for) is so hard.

But here's the truth:  You already spent the money.  It's gone.  And if you're not using the item, keeping it will only remind you of the loss.  As Joshua Becker has written, "Look around.  All that clutter used to be money."  Ouch!

It's never too late to change your shopping habits.  And meanwhile, stop punishing yourself for past purchases by keeping the stuff around to clutter your home and life.  Shift your focus so you can consider the value of more open space, peace of mind, and the ability to enjoy your home.  Jennifer Burger at simplyfiercely.com suggests that you practice saying "How I feel in my home matters."  Say it until you believe it.  And if an item isn't useful to you, pass it to someone who will use it.  Then you can consider it a gift instead of a waste.

3.  Stop thinking "It's such a waste to throw things away/get rid of things."

Try "If it's stuffed in a drawer/closet/box somewhere, it's already a waste."

It's never fun to think about how much we've wasted.  And it's not a good feeling when things no one can use have to be sent to the landfill.  The truth is, not everything can be recycled or repurposed.  And so many products made today are never meant to last.  They may be intended for a single use, or the few weeks of a fashion cycle.  Or they're plain old useless junk that no one ever needed – just dumb fads or marketing ploys.

Some stuff is just trash, even if it's stored in your home.  You need to get rid of it, and then you need to become more mindful about what you purchase going forward.  Decluttering might be about letting things go, but staying decluttered is about learning to bring less into your life.

Let your regret about how much you have to throw away reinforce your determination not to buy so much in the future.

Joshua Becker

4.  Stop thinking "I'm such a loser for letting it get this bad!"

Try "Clutter was a side effect of things going on in my life, but letting go can be healing."

Clutter often accumulates when we're going through stressful times.  My son and his roommate each have two jobs that keep them super busy just making ends meet.  And their house is cluttered!  I know they both feel the stress of work and the stress of a crowded, inefficient home.  But added feelings of guilt and shame keep them stuck.

Stressful jobs, health struggles, toddlers, and major life transitions can lead to clutter accumulation.  But instead of berating yourself, realize that you might be doing the best you can for now.

Reconsider your shopping habits, and see whether you're trying to self-soothe by making purchases.  The dopamine you get from acquiring something new is real and addicting, so look for different ways to get the uplift you need.

Meanwhile, get rid of just one thing that's unnecessary.  Do it now.  Do the same thing tomorrow, and the next day.  If you feel inspired to clear out an entire space (such as a tabletop, drawer, cupboard, or closet), go for it!  Instead of seeing clutter as a failure, see it as a symptom of your struggle, and choose to believe that you can rise above those challenges.

Related article:  Five-Minute Minimalism

5.  Stop thinking "It's so depressing to get rid of stuff."

Try "Decluttering is an opportunity to start fresh/find freedom/align my life with my values."

What you believe matters.  If decluttering feels like deprivation, you're going to have a hard time doing it.

It's like being on a restrictive diet.  If you tell yourself you can never have chocolate or pizza ever again, you're going to feel deprived.  Forever is a long time, and willpower alone won't carry you too far.  That's why Alcoholics Anonymous stresses regular meetings, sponsorship, community involvement, giving back, connecting with a Higher Power, and all the other steps that support a person's efforts to stay sober.

Yes, getting and staying clutter-free requires a complete change of mindset and habits!  That's why focusing on the benefits is so necessary.

• What if decluttering isn't about losing things but about creating space for things that matter?
• What if the goal isn't simply to own less but to thoughtfully choose the things you love?
• What if clearing out the excess isn't a chore but a way to free up time, energy, and money for what's most important to you?

Think about this – with every item you release, you're creating a home that supports the life you want to live.  Decluttering is empowering, and these new mindsets help you find more freedom, peace, and contentment every day.

Get my quick and useful cheat sheet for a decluttered home, Decluttering: The Simple Guide from A to Z.  For more inspiration, buy it in the omnibus edition, which also contains Minimalism 1-2-3: Simple Steps to a Better Life and The Minimalist Experiment.*

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