How I Created a Happy Life

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Advertisers promise happiness, don't they?  That high-performance car, sun-drenched cruise, fail-safe insurance, age-defying beauty cream, and even that hot and juicy burger will make your life better – more adventurous, relaxing, secure, alluring, and delicious!


All it costs is all the money you make (plus a load of debt) and all or most of your time and attention.


But the happiness I've received from being minimalist isn't like consumer happiness.  It doesn't require a purchase or a lifestyle where I compete with or impress others.  Most of the time, I'm content and at peace with what I have.  After all, I have a lot.  I get to do what I love, on my own timetable, and for the benefit of myself and those I love.  What more could I ask for?


Even though I'm a minimalist, I'm certainly not deprived.  I have enough furniture and housewares for comfort.  I have the modern conveniences of a stove, refrigerator, microwave, washer and dryer, central heat and air conditioning, and a car.  I'm actually living a very privileged life, and I don't want to forget that.


But now that I've been minimizing for more than 20 years, I can list some things I've done and continue to do that add to my daily happiness.


cruising



10 things that help me pursue happiness


1.  Watching/scrolling/browsing less

This comes first for a reason.  When you're exposed to less advertising, fewer marketing emails, and less compare-and-compete, it's easier to ignore the huge number of products for sale.  I watch little television, keep few apps, and limit my time on social media.  I unsubscribe from the emails sent by everyone I've ever done business with.  I don't browse (online or IRL) unless I need something.  (Well, sometimes I look at books!)


Not only does this reduce the urge for things I never knew I "needed" until I saw them advertised, but it saves me so much time, and reduces the stress of an overfull inbox every time I open email.


2.  Keeping a gratitude journal

Like many (if not most) people, I find it way too easy to focus on what I lack and what's going wrong.  When I started paying attention to all of the good things I already possess and that happen every day, I realized that I had nothing to complain about.  "Count your blessings" may sound trite, but it is truly the key to happiness.


When you begin noticing all you have to be thankful for, it's amazing how many more good things you start to see.  Writing them down gives them substance, and creates a record you can refer to whenever you need a dose of optimism.


3.  Staying out of debt

Back during the 2007-2008 economic downturn, my husband and I had an underwater mortgage, a large auto loan, and several credit cards at their maximum limit.  Yes, we took a cut in pay during those years, but the real culprit was lifestyle inflation.  As our incomes had risen, we had increased our expenses, leading to the stress and uncertainty of debt, which we hated.  It was the opposite of happiness.


We made the choice to reduce and cut the expenses we could and to become debt-free.  It was one of the best decisions we've made.




4.  Doing work I love

My work as a writer challenges me and brings great satisfaction.  In fact, my work rarely feels like work because I enjoy it so much.  Using and honing my skills as a writer, exercising my creativity, and learning as I think about and research each post brings me a lot of happiness.


I know how fortunate I am.  Not everyone has the choices I have.  Maybe you can't follow your passion right now, but I encourage you to find a way to keep it in your life.  Maybe your ideal work is a hobby or part-time gig, but it can still be a source of joy and enrichment.


5.  Reading

One study reports that 5% of adults only read one book a year, and almost 50% don't read any.  So if you read two books this year, you're doing better than most!


The teacher in me cringes at statistics like that.  Reading has so many benefits.  It doesn't just give you information, it actually creates neural pathways and stimulates the areas of your brain that allow you to remember, problem-solve, and think abstractly.  Reading fiction reduces stress and increases empathy by letting you relate to characters in situations different from your own.


It makes me happy to create new brain cells and expand my world.  I think it will make you happier too.


Related article:  The Magic of Reading


6.  Getting outside

It's possible nowadays to spend all your time inside or in a vehicle.  Many people do it – the only time they're outside is when they're walking from the car to the office, store, or into their house.


We're designed to be in close communion with nature.  It relieves anxiety and depression, boosts the immune system, helps us focus, inspires creativity, and more.  Even a few minutes in the sun increases dopamine levels, which improves mood, memory, and motivation.


Quiet time outside – in a park, garden, or even on my porch – makes me happy.




outside, with music


7.  Making and listening to music

Yes, I'm a musician, but it isn't just my own bias that causes me to add music to my life every day.  Plenty of studies have shown the benefits of listening to or making music.  For example, singing releases a large number of endorphins, which improves your mood, increases your energy, and even relieves pain.  Playing any instrument improves your focus and your memory, and practice teaches patience and perseverance.  Listening to your favorite music can relax you, enhance movement and exercise, or even happily remind you of people and experiences from your past.


Music is also something you can share with other people, whether you listen or play.  Experiencing a concert together can be unforgettable, but I find that working as a team to create a musical performance is challenging, creative, social, and ultimately exhilarating!


8.  Giving to those who need it

I used to justify a lot of excess shopping by turning my purchases into gifts.  I would see something enticing, but feel guilty about buying it for myself.  So I'd think of someone I could give it to.  I'm sure I bought plenty of things the recipients didn't need or want, but that didn't stop me.  The pleasure of buying lasted a moment; the pleasure of giving lasted a bit longer.


We give plenty to those who already have more than enough, but giving to someone who's truly in need fills me with joy.  I choose effective charities, such as Against Malaria Foundation and Helen Keller International, so my dollars have the most impact.


9.  Decluttering

Despite my minimalist lifestyle, unneeded and unwanted items creep in.  I donate or give away items I don't use, and try to throw away as little as possible (although sometimes it can't be helped).  Once a month, I take 15 minutes or so to go through a drawer, cupboard, or closet.  I'm happy living with only what I need, use, and love.


10.  Enjoying positive interactions

It makes me happy to be friendly and greet others with a "Good morning!" or even just a smile.  In fact, smiling has been shown to improve your mood even if you don't feel happy at that moment.  Using those facial muscles sends a signal to your brain which triggers the release of feel-good chemicals like dopamine and serotonin, essentially tricking you into a happier frame of mind.  Plus, others find you more approachable when you smile, which opens the door to more friendly exchanges.


When I can, I like to give a sincere compliment, which doesn't just make the recipient happy.  Studies show that being kind increases our feelings of usefulness and well-being, which makes us happy too.


Connection is essential for a thriving life, so I email, text, write a letter, or call a loved one each day.  Even for an introvert like me, membership in a community completes me.





Small actions, big results


These are all simple things.  But together they've made my life pretty wonderful, and I wouldn't want to live any other way.


Think about the choices and actions that increase your happiness (or steal my list – I won't mind!), and be sure to make them a regular part of your days.


Do you appreciate my work?  Why not buy me a coffee?


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