Maximum Gratitude, Minimal Stuff

Have you ever worked so hard to generate holiday magic that you made it impossible to feel any magic?  When we say yes to everything, we court exhaustion and overwhelm.  We turn the season into a grueling marathon, which defeats every reason we gave ourselves for doing so much. We should probably say no to plenty of things during the holidays, just to save our sanity.  But then how do we make them special?  Just saying no seems so dull. Saying yes with thoughtfulness and intention is a positive way to approach any task or project because it sets your priorities and helps you manage your expectations.  Too many expectations and you feel stress and failure if you aren't able to achieve them, and too few (or zero) expectations and you feel unmotivated and run the risk of missing out on positive experiences. So consider these possibilities for saying yes this holiday season, and craft a Christmas that is less harried and more happy. 6 items that belong on your holi...

It's time to get out all your boxes of ornaments and the artificial tree (or trees) you store every year.  Do you set aside an entire day, or even more, to get all your decorations up?  Are you risking your neck to hang Christmas lights?  If you've been accumulating holiday décor for years (or decades), you probably have almost enough stuff to set up shop. Now maybe decorating for the holidays is one of your favorite events of the season.  Maybe you gather family or friends, put out some snacks, play suitable music, and have a ball filling every nook and cranny with mementos of the season.  If it's a tradition you crave each year, and it brings you and your companions great joy, go for it!  Minimalism, after all, is about intentionally making space and time for what is most important to you. Related article:  How Minimalism Makes Room for Joy Why you might be ready for less But maybe it's become more of a chore than a joy, or maybe you're just tired o...

We all know we're supposed to be in a thankful mood at this time of year.  And of course we know – in an academic sort of way – that we have plenty to be thankful for.  But as we look around the world, at our own cities and neighborhoods, or maybe even into our own homes and relationships, we see things that don't make us happy. The world is far from perfect.  Many horrible things are undeniably real.  It would be easy to just give up in despair, and believe me, I'm sometimes tempted. But darkness is not all that exists.  Our world also contains so much beauty, and human beings can be brilliant and kind. The feeling of gratitude doesn't require blindness to reality, but it is a choice . Sometimes gratitude is easy. Did you know Italian tenor Luciano Pavarotti was a survivor of tetanus? Just after WWII, as a boy of 12, Pavarotti was hospitalized with the disease.  He was in a coma for two weeks and given last rites twice. This is what it's like to nearly die...

Maybe you're broke.  Maybe you're appalled at the environmental costs.  Or maybe you're tired of compulsory consumerism. I get it.  I've been to those extended-family Christmases where there's a ten-minute turmoil of present opening, a tornado of ribbons and wrapping paper, and piles of presents that are destined to be tossed, returned the next day, or stuffed into the back of a closet. We spend how much ? The average monthly car payment in the U.S. is $568.  Which is ridiculous.  Yet most people are spending far more than that for Christmas gifts. Average household spending on Christmas gifts in the U.S. is $886 .  Women do most of the shopping, and spend an average of 20 hours searching for gifts. Additionally, 41% of U.S. adults say they're willing to go into debt for Christmas gifts.  Is it worth it? Let's look at the waste. Americans spend $15.2 billion on unwanted gifts , and about 61% of people surveyed expect to get at least one gift they don'...

Gift-giving is historically significant.  In fact, giving a gift to show honor or appreciation, or to cement social or economic bonds, is an ancient practice.  So is giving gifts to a newly-married couple or a newborn baby. But in spite of these age-old traditions, we don't seem to do it very well. What makes gift-giving such as challenge? Part of the problem might be that our culture expects us to do it so often .  Gone are the days when a child might get one present on his birthday and a handful at Christmas.  Now we give gifts because it's the first day of school, or the first day of summer.  Or because we went through a fast food drive-thru.  Or because she asked for it in the store. We give gifts at Easter and Valentine's Day.  We give gifts for Mother's Day, Father's Day, Grandparents' Day, Administrative Assistants' Day, and more.  We give gifts to teachers, coaches, and pastors.  We give gifts to say "Get well" or "I'm thinking of ...

I used to own too much stuff.  It made my home feel crowded and stressful, and since I like things to be tidy, I spent hours every week sorting, arranging, organizing, and cleaning my belongings. Then I began decluttering, and the situation gradually improved. Decluttering can take a lot of time and effort.  It requires a ton of decision-making.  But the end result brings such ease and relief that you never want to go back to your old cluttered existence!   That's why it's important to develop some new habits so that clutter doesn't creep back into your home and undo all your good work.  Creating the habits takes some discipline, but the good news is that most of them only take about one minute .  (Really!) So what are you waiting for?  Pick one and start practicing it today, adding others as you're able.  Your home will be relaxed and tidy, and you'll be able to spend your time in ways that bring more enjoyment. Related article: 5 Ways to Li...

If you've been dreaming about shifting away from toys and presents for the holidays, here's the guide you've been looking for. For one of our most memorable Christmases as a family, we skipped gifts and made a getaway to the charming village of Mendocino, on the Northern California coast.  We visited the botanical gardens, rode the Skunk Train through redwood forests, and savored fantastic ocean views (coastal California has less fog in winter than summer, and the sunsets are remarkable).  We spent afternoons at the beaches, book stores, and art galleries, and evenings playing board games in front of our in-room fireplace.  I brought our crèche set, and we put it up and read the story * of Jesus' birth on Christmas Eve. * This blog is reader-supported.  If you buy through my links, I may earn a small commission. On Christmas morning everything was closed, but we strolled down Main Street, bundled in jeans and warm hoodies and enjoying the pale winter sun.  Sud...

I'm quitting sugar. I mean it!  Like a junkie, I've tried this before and failed .  But I know people who are successfully fighting alcohol dependence.  I know plenty of people who have quit smoking.  Some have had to try several times before the change stuck, so just because I've fallen short before is no excuse not to try again. In fact, previous failure just makes it clear how essential it is for me to overcome my sugar habit.  If it's so hard to do – even though I want to do it – that indicates addiction, right?  And addiction to something that is so harmful in the long run has to be beaten. Like a drug Did you know that sugar acts like a drug in our brains?  Glucose is the brain's main fuel, so we've been hardwired to like sweets.  But sugar stimulates a dopamine response the same way heroin does .  That strong feeling of reward makes us want even more.  So when we have a sugar habit, it's hard to quit it. But it is possible! Okay...