How to Create a Simpler Life in the Modern World

Everything is so simple nowadays, isn't it?  Just go online!  

• Order clothes online (Of course, when they arrive they may not fit, and they're an expensive hassle to return.) 
• Order food online (Sorry, you can't customize for rye bread, no onions, and light mayonnaise.)
• Pay your bills online (Unless they're recurring and can be automated, you still have to create an account, log into the account, come up with yet another new password every so often, enter the payment information, and write the transaction in your bank book.) 

I'm not the only one with these feelings.

Since when did writing a check and putting a stamp on an envelope become hard?  Especially if you know exactly where your checkbook and stamps are, because they have a place to belong.  There's nothing wrong with paying online, but it is not easier and faster.  (Although it does benefit the company you're paying – they get their money sooner and can hire fewer people to process accounts receivable.)  

And not having a brick and mortar clothing store or decent service in a restaurant hasn't seemed to make life easier or better.

There are other modern amenities that make simple things more complicated or more expensive, such as a smart refrigerator to tell you you're out of milk or eggs.  If you're unable to open the door and see that, then using a refrigerator at all may be difficult for you.  Otherwise, it seems intrusive and a waste of money, since you can just make a shopping list on an index card.

I promised myself I wouldn't rant, so I'll simply say that I am not the only person who longs for a simpler life.  Plenty of people wish for a slower, more organic life with periods for both solitude and deep connection with others.

Moving to a cabin in the woods isn't possible for most of us, and that might not be easier anyway.  But there are ways to stay in the modern urban or suburban world and still live more simply.

6 steps to a simpler life in the 2020's

1.  Become cell phone minimal.

Pay phones have disappeared, so it probably isn't possible to live without a cell phone.  But you can put your phone in "do not disturb" mode and let people know that you check your email and messages three or four times a day.  You can designate a specific list of people whose calls and texts get through so that you can be reached in an emergency (say your spouse, your mom, and/or your kids' school).  Other people can learn that you will respond to their call or text within a couple of hours, so you're still available, just not constantly interruptible.

At the same time, remove time-destroying games and apps, or at the very least put them in a folder on another page in the menu so they aren't a temptation every time you check your phone.

2.  Don't click "like."

While you might at first feel that your social network is shrinking if you stop participating in Facebook, Twitter, and the rest, I think you'll find that you make more time and effort for the relationships that really matter to you.  

A hundred likes, heart emojis, and "aww" comments about your friend's new baby will never mean as much as if you visit her, bring a casserole for her freezer, and actually hold and cuddle that child!  Instead of maintaining a tenuous connection to someone you knew briefly in high school 20 years ago or an acquaintance from a 2019 Zumba class, you'll enrich your life with deeper, more meaningful friendships.

For more inspiration in this area, I highly recommend Cal Newport's Digital Minimalism: Choosing a Focused Life in a Noisy World.*

* This blog is reader-supported.  If you buy through my links, I may earn a small commission.

3.  Declutter.

You knew I was going to say this!  For more peace and calm, greater efficiency, faster and easier cleaning, and so much more, get your belongings down to the essential.  Find more reasons and inspiration here, here, here, and here.

4.  Stop using credit cards and build a savings account.

My husband and I have been held hostage by five-figure credit card debt, and we know for sure that life is freer and more fun without it!  

Yes, we were able to acquire a lot of stuff we couldn't otherwise afford... and that's the problem.  It was stuff we couldn't afford, and we stole from future earnings to pay for it.  Restaurant meals, clothing, and gifts were the stupidest purchases to pay for over time, but so were concerts, vacations, and other experiences.  Because of credit card bills, we had zero margin in our budget.  All income above basic necessities went to pay for our excesses of the past.

Without debt, we use our income for some items and experiences today and save for fun and emergencies in the future.  We have never had as much disposable income as we have now, not because we earn so much more, but because we have no debts.

Obviously, if you are disciplined enough to use a credit card to earn air miles or cash rebates while paying off the balance every month, good for you!

5.  Learn to say no.

Our society encourages us to ignore limits.  Buy more, do more, be more is the constant message.  Yet we are finite human beings, and limits are the reality.  That doesn't mean we can't learn, grow, and stretch our capabilities, but it does mean that we can't have it all or do it all.  And why should we?  When we focus, our true abilities have a chance to develop.  When we set boundaries, we become more creative.

Saying no can be hard at first, but you'll be happier if you have enough time and energy for what really matters to you.

6.  Keep some old-fashioned independence.

Before you buy into the latest and greatest, decide whether the old way that has worked for decades will work for you.  I've already mentioned the smart refrigerator, but really this goes for all smart appliances.  Do you need a blender you can control with your phone?  Do you need a $100 smart mug?  An automatic pot stirrer?  A microwave you can talk to?  (These are real products available today.)  Soon you'll need a live-in robot to handle every job in the kitchen, because apparently making toast and coffee will be beyond your capabilities.

Our grandparents never needed gym memberships because they actually used their bodies to do things like sweep, vacuum, weed the yard, push a lawn mower, rake, wash windows, knead dough, walk or bicycle to errands, and more.  They had lifelong friends because they knew their neighbors, visited each other's houses, went to church or a service club together, and wrote letters or made phone calls.  

Their interactions weren't reduced to the quick click of a like button.

I'm not suggesting we go back to using a washboard, telegraph, or horse and buggy – just that we think about where our choices may lead.  Instead of mindlessly buying into the hype, let's keep our independence and be more intentional about creating a simpler life.

I'm going to go pay the medical bill sitting on my desk – with my checkbook, an envelope, and a stamp.  Done!

Updated July 2023