Why You Should Ask a Different Question This Holiday

By
Most of us have asked our kids or grandkids, spouses, or siblings, parents, or coworkers, "What do you want for Christmas?"


We encourage them to wish for things during the holiday season.  And the answers are usually material items:  toys, clothes, things for the home, or some other tangible or experiential gift they've been wanting.  


Or maybe the answer is, "Nothing!  I already have everything I need."  Maybe the desires are intangible:  "I just want us to get together this season."  Or even, "I wish the vaccine for COVID could be developed and perfected and available ASAP."


loving father and son



But there's another question we should ask ourselves and others this holiday:

What can you give this Christmas?


We all have abilities and resources that we can share with others.  Even children can come up with good answers to this question – gifts they can give to friends, family, neighbors, and even strangers.  When we make it a habit to ask a different question, we can gradually change our default holiday mindset from "what I want to get" to "what I'm able to give."





32 gifts for everyone that anyone can give this holiday

1.  Smile!

2.  Faithfully observe COVID protocols (it's not about compliance – it's about compassion).

3.  Share cheerful holiday greetings.

4.  Hold the door for someone.

5.  Let someone get in line before you.

6.  Pay for the coffee order of the person in line behind you.

7.  Be patient and cheerful with anyone who serves you.

8.  Donate to the local food pantry.

9.  Choose unneeded toys in good condition to donate to a local daycare, preschool, or domestic abuse shelter.

10.  Donate excess coats and winter gear to a homeless shelter, rather than keeping them for yourself "just in case."

11.  Put a dollar in the Salvation Army bucket.

12.  Write a thank you note, not for a gift received, but for how kind/thoughtful/helpful/awesome someone has been to you all year.

13.  Offer an evening of babysitting so young parents can shop.

14.  Follow up with someone who lost a loved one this year.  We tend to express sympathy and then forget about it, even though people are still grieving.

15.  Help a neighbor with yard work.

16.  Hang extra lights on your house to brighten your neighborhood.

17.  Double your dinner recipe, and deliver the extra meal to someone in quarantine (call ahead, of course, to make arrangements).

18.  Go caroling.

19.  Donate blood.

20.  Quit complaining.

21.  Let your sibling (or someone else) choose the game or movie (or restaurant or other activity).

22.  Give a sincere compliment.

23.  Write a letter to a deployed service member.

24.  Pray for someone outside of your usual list.

25.  Pick up trash as you walk around your neighborhood or through the park.

26.  Take care of a chore that is not normally your responsibility.

27.  Make and send a holiday card to a hospitalized child (it's not too late for New Year cards).

28.  Be a patient, courteous driver.

29.  Say you're sorry.

30.  Call someone with whom you've been out of touch.

31.  Say "I love you."

32.  Turn off notifications, turn off the TV, and give your focused and undivided attention.





I think the joy of what you can give will far outweigh anything you get this season.





Updated May 2023


Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

How to Beat 3 Blocks that Keep You Cluttered

By
Image
You may not realize it, but you could be harboring some beliefs that make it difficult (or even impossible) to declutter and stay that way.  These are common mindsets that can hold us back.  If you're struggling to declutter, it's time to identify the thoughts that are making it so hard. Decluttering block #1: I hate tossing things out. I think we can agree that throwing things out feels wasteful and bad.  Especially if your parents or grandparents lived through the Depression or the World War II era, this mindset runs deep.  The urge to keep everything (even things that are broken) will be stronger if you or your family have a history of trauma or hoarding.  You might not even be aware of how strong this inner compulsion is until you start trying to declutter. If you find it hard to get rid of broken, frayed, outgrown, neglected, or otherwise unused things, see if one of these reminders can help: 1.  The reprimand might not be coming from you. Your aversio...
Read more

Why You Should Try Wearing the Same Clothes Every Day

By
Image
Wearing the same clothes every day would get boring, wouldn't it? A long time ago, I had a job that required a uniform, and I have to say it did make life easier .  I had three copies of my work outfit, and there was never a question about what to wear.  I never worried whether my clothes were stylish or "right," because everyone else wore the same thing. The same argument has been used in public and private schools in favor of student uniforms.  Rather than constant worries about fashion and comparisons and dress codes, a uniform makes everything simple.  It's one less thing to think about in the complex life of a student. Many people argue that clothes make a statement about who you are.  "I express myself through my clothes" is a comment I've often heard, usually from women.  The idea of a uniform scares them, because how will they make themselves noticeable or unique ? I think we might be imagining some sort of Handmaid's Tale society, where we...
Read more

Why You Should Make "Less is More" Your Mantra for Life

By
Image
Maybe you've heard the saying popularized by architect Mies van der Rohe in 1947:  "Less is more." It's an oxymoron – a phrase that seems to contradict itself.  Others include "old news," "open secret," "unbiased opinion," and "awfully good."  Or the lament, "Parting is such sweet sorrow." What does "less is more" mean?  It's wonderfully open-ended.  Answers to that are as varied as the people who reply.  Consider: Less anxiety, more peace. Less debt, more savings. Less busywork, more substance. Less clutter, more space. Less comparison, more contentment. Less sugar, more vegetables. Voluntary simplicity Back in the 1990s, a fair number of Americans realized that the continual quest for more and better was stressing them out and keeping them from creating lives of purpose.  After the consumerist binge of the yuppie-era 80s, some started wondering if the big house, flashy car, exotic vacation, and Rolex we...
Read more

Share the Joy - Giving the Gift of Hygge

By
Image
The international interest in the Danish lifestyle hygge (pronounced "hoo-gah") has been co-opted by retailers who want to sell to us.  Of course, we do need items to make life more comfortable, such as beds, tables, chairs, clothing, and food.  I happen to think we also need books, flowers, and candles.  No one – not even a minimalist like me – can stop consuming while they're alive. But what we can control is how much we buy that's unnecessary, and how much we waste.  And since hygge is an experience you can create, not a thing you can buy, we don't really need to purchase anything to have a more hyggeligt life.  A sunrise, a crisp and juicy apple, birdsong, the scent of rain, or a long, strong hug can provide that. 13 great hygge gifts So how do you give the gift of hygge?  What can you offer a loved one that will truly add to their stock of  comfort, joy, and life satisfaction ?  Here are some ideas, large and small, that shouldn't add to yo...
Read more

6 Quick and Easy Steps to Declutter Before the Holidays

By
Image
The holidays are just around the corner, and as you shop for and cook your Thanksgiving feast and prepare to put up Christmas or Hanukkah decorations, you'll enjoy it all even more if you do a quick clear-out while you have the chance. Not only can you make room for the Christmas tree, but you can help the whole family feel less overwhelmed by holiday bustle, and give yourself more space to savor what the season has to offer.  You'll feel better prepared for holiday guests, and more ready for a fun and relaxed celebration. I know you're extra-busy, so this is not an intense purge.  It's a quick, refreshing chance to set the stage, with the added benefit of beginning the New Year with less clutter and more freedom. So set aside 15-30 minutes for each step in the process, and let your success in one area carry you to the next with renewed energy! The quick clear-out 1.  Start in the kitchen. Many holiday traditions involve food.  Crowded counters and crammed, hard-to-a...
Read more