Maximum Gratitude, Minimal Stuff

I recently had a milestone birthday, one I might normally have celebrated with a big party, friends, and family.  But with COVID-19 protocols in place, my husband and I ordered a nice takeout dinner which we ate at home, just the two of us.  The next day, my daughter, son-in-law, and my two young grandsons visited.  We all wore masks and ate at two different tables separated by more than six feet.  I almost let myself feel disappointment.  I was tempted.  Wow, it's so easy to fall into self-pity, isn't it?  An organization (and  book *) called A Complaint Free World estimates that the average person complains aloud 15 to 30 times each day.  That doesn't count the negative comments we  think .   *  This blog is reader-supported.  If you purchase through my links, I may earn a small commission. An eye-opening experiment I generally think of myself as a positive, upbeat person, relatively complaint free.  Guess what...

A budget gives us control over where our money is going, and a zero-based budget gives us a plan for every dollar. 8 steps to create a zero-based budget 1.  Remember what's essential. If you're struggling to make ends meet, you need to focus on your bare essentials.  These are: food – You need to keep food in your belly. shelter – You need a roof over your head. utilities – You need to keep the light and heat on and the water running. personal maintenance – You need to keep yourself and your home clean. transportation – You need to be able to get to work. communication – You need to be able to keep in touch with work and loved ones. 2.  Know your priorities. Every human being has the same essential needs, but our dreams and desires differ.  For my husband and I, living on one salary so I could stay home and teach our children was a priority.  For others, retiring before age 50 might be what matters most.  Maybe you really want to keep a horse, or you'...

To many, the idea of a budget seems restrictive, boring, and old fashioned.  But believe it or not, "budget" is not a dirty word, and a budget is not an outdated idea, but a useful tool for us today. The process of making a budget helps us focus on our needs, of course, but it also lets us find a way to afford our desires.  A budget doesn't tell us what we  can't  spend – it's simply a plan for how we choose to use our money.    Many of us are near-sighted about money. We pay our bills every month, and manage to afford clothes, restaurant meals, salon appointments, and our morning lattes.  But somehow we're always caught short by our annual auto registration fees or property taxes.  Lots of our entertainment requires a credit card, as does any true emergency.  We don't save much for retirement, even though it's inevitable that someday we will need or want to stop working.  And we may dream about something we really want to have or do, bu...

There's always more than one way to look at things. If you're like I was, you firmly believe that owning your own home is the only choice for a right-thinking person.  It took the experience of owning for me to start questioning whether that was always true. In the school of experience My husband and I moved four times to four different apartments in our first four years of marriage, then bought a house and stayed there for eight years. When we moved to a larger town for a better job, we sold our first house for about 50% more than we had originally paid for it.  I thought we had done well.  But after subtracting the amount we had spent on home improvements over the years, I realized we had actually made far less on the sale. We rented an apartment in our new town so we could get to know the area before deciding to buy another house.  Our rent was approximately the same as our previous house payment, but of course it didn't qualify as a tax deduction the way our mort...

Now and then, I like to splurge.  I savor every bit of a filet mignon dinner.  I enjoy live theater.  It's wonderful to stay at a cozy inn on the Mendocino coast. But my tastes are actually very simple.  I could probably live on sourdough bread, cheddar cheese, fresh seasonal fruit, and minestrone soup.  My Starbucks order is a tall latte with one pump of vanilla.  My favorite outfit is black or dark wash jeans and a jewel-colored, three-quarter sleeve tee shirt.  I love library books, crossword puzzles, and the classical music station .  Give me a drizzly day and a wooded path and I'm in seventh heaven. For a happy life, cultivate simple tastes. A lot of people believe that if you're not striving for ever greater success, if you don't have an extensive bucket list, you can never be happy.  I think they've got it wrong.  If you want to be happy, you need to appreciate the things around you, the things you can enjoy every day.  You ...

It's Patriot Day in the U.S., the National Day of Service and Remembrance on September 11. It's generally thought of as a day to remember the nearly 3,000 victims of the 9/11 terrorist attacks, but it's also a time to be thankful for all of the first responders who risked their lives, and the many others who pitched in to help and comfort those who were affected by the tragedy. We can be heroes too. Maybe I can't run into a burning building and save someone's life, but I can do other valuable acts.  It would be a better way to celebrate this day than shopping yet another sale. Today is the perfect time to volunteer for an organization that improves the lives of others, spreading kindness and offering hope.  I could also give money to fund programs at such an organization, drop off a bag of groceries at my local food closet (or some food and treats at the animal shelter), or simply pick up garbage in my neighborhood or the park. Today is a good time to write one or m...

Let's say a man wears a navy or gray suit with a white dress shirt every day.  The only change he makes is his tie.  Former President Obama did this, explaining, "I'm trying to  pare down decisions .  I don't want to make decisions about what I'm eating or wearing because I have too many other decisions to make."   To which almost everyone said, "Cool.  That makes sense."   Yes... it's harder for a woman. When Facebook CEO Mark Zuckerberg wears jeans, a gray tee shirt, and a gray hoodie every day, or any other man wears Levi's and a white Oxford button-down as a daily uniform, people either make no comment, or decide that the look is "iconic" and makes a lot of sense for a busy, important man. However, if a woman wears a signature outfit every day, most people write her off as unstylish and/or unfeminine.  People wonder if she's letting herself go.  When Hillary Clinton went through a period of wearing dark pant suits (the close...

Have you wanted to try dressing with a capsule wardrobe but don't know where to begin?  You recognize the ease and clarity a minimal closet can provide, but still want to put stylish outfits together with confidence. You can simplify your wardrobe today .  I'll tell you how to reach your goal in four easy steps. Step 1: Choose a base color. One secret to dressing stylishly and well with a smaller wardrobe is to limit colors.  This doesn't mean you need to dress all in black.  A capsule wardrobe can certainly include bright color.   The trick is to choose a base color.  A base color is a neutral that can be worn with many other hues , such as black, brown, navy, khaki, gray, or denim.   This is the color you want to use for trousers, skirts, jackets, cardigans, suits, and dresses that you wear over and over. Look in your closet and pull out the trousers, skirts, suits, or cardigans and jackets that you wear most often and feel most comfortable and...